So many people have come up to me after I’ve made a public appearance and asked me, “What should I do? Inside myself I know that I am called to help the world in some way but I don’t know how.”
So I ask, “What do you worry about or care about most in the world?”
“I’m not sure.”
“Well, do you have a skill or a talent or a passion that you want to express in helping?”
“I don’t know that either.”
Looking into people’s eyes, you can see this a painful conversation to have. It is like being in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean and you can’t see land and you know you are supposed to go somewhere but you don’t know where. You have lost your compass.
From earliest childhood we are taught to do things we don’t care about and to ignore the things we do. At school, we do homework we are not interested in, sit at desks all day when we are restless, ignore subjects we are passionate about but don’t get graded on.
Then, we get jobs and continue to try to “master ourselves” to get ahead. We are tyrannized by clocks and calendars and schedules and obligations and we are told not to pay attention to that inner compass but to turn it off.
But for some of us, the call never goes away. We hear the voice but–after years of ignoring it–we don’t know what it says. That is because we have become alienated from ourselves. And to know what we care about, we have to be learn to be intimate with our Selves.
The Christians might say we have to find the Kingdom of Heaven within ourselves. The Buddhists say we have to perceive our karma.
But how does one get intimate with one Self?
- One way to become intimate with yourself is to begin actually paying attention to what your Self is saying. Keep a journal by your bed. When you wake up in the morning, write down your dreams.
- You don’t have to interpret them or understand them. You just have to pay attention to them. In doing so, you let your Self know you want to listen. What could be more intimate than that?
- Some people say they have no dreams at night. But often that is because they have fallen out of the habit of listening. That is what this exercise is about. Convincing our Selves to speak louder, that someone wants to hear. So if you wake up and can’t remember the dream, just write whatever comes to mind for ten minutes. If only a dream fragment comes to you, write that down.
- Even just writing what comes to mind is an exercise of listening to the Self.
- Do this exercise when you can for a few weeks.
- It is not the end of the process, it is the beginning. It is the beginning of listening and knowing your Self. What you care about will come in bits and pieces.
- Don’t worry about what comes next. Just take this first step. Once your compass appears, it will point you in the right direction.
- When you Self knows you are listening, it will finally start to tell you where to go.